Monday, April 23, 2012

created for this


This weekend we carved out some precious time for our family of 5 and decided to head to one of our favorite places for the day - Notre Dame University. Billy's sister April was home from Chicago for the day and brought her niece Kelissa with her, so together we had a crew of 7. Dressed in our best ND gear to cheer on the Irish we headed for the annual Blue Gold game where the team scrimmages against themselves in the football stadium. Perhaps this sounds silly to some, but for these faithful fans it meant chance to experience the excitement of game day at a fraction of the cost. A perfect fit for my little Irish fans!

I love the feeling of college campuses, it's like I can almost smell my own college memories in the air. Just stepping onto ND took me back to my college days... the rhythm of walking from class to class and the fresh air it provided me. The naps snuck in the middle of the day simply because I could. The late night coffee house dates with friends, and studying things I was passionate about. Because I attended a christian college (Bethel College) my college experience was also rich in time spent seeking the Lord and growing in my relationship with him. As we walked around ND's campus on a gorgeous spring day I had a moment of "I wanna go back" flood over me. It all seemed so carefree back then. I didn't worry about what I was going to make my family for dinner, the endless errands to run, or the mountain of laundry that was screaming my name. I focused on me in college. To this momma who always seems to put a bit too much on her to-do list that sounded so wonderful. I let myself get lost in that fantasy of hours upon hours of "me" time for a bit as we walked....then I felt a hand grab mine and it was my husbands. That boy who I fell in love with back in high school, and missed terribly during college, had reached over and laced his fingers between mine as we quietly walked with the kiddos running in front of us. And then it hit me. College was a special season in my life. But life with my best friend and husband, being a momma and pouring all the energy and patience that I have into our 3 little ones is what I was created for.

As quickly as the college memories came they went and I had a new perspective on the beautiful day in front of me. This is what I longed for during those years spent apart from Billy - to simply walk hand in hand with him and not have to say goodbye at the end of the day. To someday have a family and experience a love like no other. With this fresh insight at the front of my mind our family day seemed to explode into a thousand beautiful little moments that I wanted to hold onto forever.

 My heart smiled as I watched Ella take care of Kelissa and hold her little hand no matter where they went.

 It stood still as I watched Will enter the grotto to light a candle with the reverence of a grown man.

It skipped a beat when my little Mason whispered, "I love you SO SO SO much Mommy" as I was carrying him across campus.

Simple moments...that to this momma who is such a work in progress were beautiful little gifts to my heart.

This is what I was created for... these days of dishes and laundry and errands. To those who may be like me and struggling with finding the purpose in the midst of the chaos my prayer is that you will be blessed with a fresh perspective today - even if just for a moment.

A moment where the mundane becomes beautiful - a moment where your heart swells and you feel fully alive.

A moment where you know this is what you were created for.


  1. Carrie, I am already in love with your blog! You have the biggest heart ever and Im so blessed to call you my friend, you have no idea how much you encourage me, I love you!!

  2. Jen - the feeling is mutual! We've wanted to be momma's for so we're enjoying this crazy ride! I've loved you for as long as I can remember Jen!!!